How to Get Out of Jury Duty

My dad had jury duty today. He didn't get picked. We have our suspicions as to why.

Exhibit A:

When my dad left for the day his shoes were, allegedly, in tact. By the time he got to the court room, one shoe reportedly "came unglued."

Exhibit B:

He then asked the court secretary for some tape where he proceeded to tape his shoe together.
Exhibit C:

Aside from the awkward "step-squack" sound he made when waking to the front of the room to answer questions, he thought everything was ok and no one would be the wiser. That was until he looked down and saw his right foot.

Exhibit D:

Turns out jury duty might be good for your civic conscious, but it's no so good for your sole(s).